Threes?

If it's true that deaths come in threes, then I've had my three and deserve a respite. I adamantly declare that I've had enough of people and pets dying. I'm done, I'm sad, my whole body is sad. I loved my dad, though he was the hardest one of the three to be around. I loved my Mary, and really admired her fight right up to the end, but we didn't see each other every day. The damn dog was part of my every day. Even at work I was thinking about him when I had to brush dog hair off my clothes.

So I hereby declare that noone close to me can die for quite a while so I can recover.

Vince

Our dog died today, two years after the vet said he had six months. He was a giant yellow lab and once belonged to my ex-husband. Prince Mikey brought him home after their dad died. He's been here five years and was almost 14 years old. I'm allergic to dogs, and this guy shed like torrential rain. But he was such a sweet old dog. I loved him, groomed him, walked him, fed him. He was gentle with kids, only barked when a stranger was at the door, came when called (most of the time). Just wanted to be loved. He slept on my bed when Mike wasn't home. He loved to be chased around our little condo with his toys. I had a stuffed Detroit Lion that roared, and that became one of his favorites. I loved seeing him run around with the lion in his mouth and I would say, "look, even my dog can beat the Lions!" My heart is broken.

2009

Here we go - it's already 11 days into 2009 and I'm still not done processing everything from 2008. I'm becoming more and more feeble-minded - or I've just lived through one hell of a year. Maybe both? Here's what I wrote on the first of last year, and I'm surprised I didn't write anything about the wedding or weddings that consumed the first nine months of 2008.

I've got a lot to do in the next ten years. I have to stay healthy because they don't deserve to lose another parent too early. I have to get my finances in order because I don't want to be poor. I'm nine credits into this master's degree, so it would be good to finish - and keep the 4.0 I've got going so far.
I'd like to move to a warmer climate and hope the boys won't be too far away so that we can always be together at holidays. I hope to go to Paris or Rome or both. I'd like to visit Las Vegas and Honolulu too. I would really like grandchildren, and I'd like to still have my parents around. They are 76 and 78 now, and going strong! I'd like my brother to get his act together - that would certainly increase the life expectancy of mom and dad.

I haven't done much to be healthier; I still need to get my finances in order; I have 12 credits done and a 3.9 gpa and am enrolled again this winter semester. Thinking more and more about the warmer climate as I look at 10 inches of snow, another week of below zero temps after having spent the last week of December in sunny Florida.

Still plan to visit Paris, Rome and Honolulu, went to Vegas -- BORING. Still want grandchildren, will wait patiently. Don't have both parents around. (see earlier post) Brother still needs to get act together.

Started 2008 with Dad and college roommate Mary. Ended the year with both of them gone. Luckily both were at the wedding and could share in my very happy time. I wish Mary had a better spot in my girlfriend picture, she was ready to end the night though, and I made her stay for the picture. She's in the very back row, last one on the right.

For 2009

I am so thankful that Prince Dan lets me share in his life, and I will do what I can to help him start anew with Laura now that they are back in Michigan. I just wish that Prince Mike would understand that's all I need and want from him. He probably does understand, because he withholds it like a weapon. But I will do what I can to help him be a grown-up, because he resists that as much as he resists my love. I will also encourage my mother's independence. She's smart and capable and she needs to boost her confidence. The crazy thing is - she's totally dependent on me one minute, then tells me what to do the next!! I need to remember these things with my own children.

I'll look for baby steps to improve my health, bought vitamins yesterday! And pay down the credit cards - $10,000 less debt by this time next year, since I'm not paying anyone's tuition or car payments or weddings. Only three weddings on the horizon for this year, compared to last year's five; and two graduations - Lindsay and JJ.

Most of all, I will let my girlfriends know how much they meant to me through the year, good times and bad. All the chicks in that picture, including my two sisters, helped me and my family in some way this past year, and I love them dearly for it.